Category Archives: Sunday Offerrings

If You Give a Girl a Groupon*

Groupon by WOVOX Team

If you give a girl a Groupon to buy plants at a nursery, she’s going to want to plant them.

She’ll start to till the soil and realize she needs to weed the flower bed.

She’ll weed the flower bed and realize her plants need plant food.

She’ll go to get the plant food and see that the recycling hasn’t been done.

She’ll get her sons to sort out all the cans and glass in separate trash cans and put them in the car to take to the recycling center.

When they come back from the recycling center, she’ll realize the car smells like old beer bottles. So, she’ll bribe ask her daughter to wash the car.

When the trash cans are emptied, she’ll smell that they are filled with stinky liquid and debris. So, she’ll get her son to wash them off.

When the trash cans are moved from their spots, she’ll see that the side yard needs to be swept and washed.

So, she’ll use the broom to clean it, and when it’s almost done, she’ll step back to admire her work. That’s when she’ll realize the rain gutters too, are full of debris.

So, she’ll ask her husband for some help and he’ll bring a ladder there. When he begins to clear the clutter, he’ll realize the tree needs to be trimmed.

Her husband will trim the trees and clear the gutters,  and uncover an ant colony. So, he’ll have the spray with ant spray. After her husband fumigates the gutters, she’ll have to hose off the windows and walls.

When the hose is unwound, she’ll take it to the flower beds.  That’s when she will discover she didn’t finish planting her new plants. Which she bought with a Groupon. Which started this crazy chain of events in the first place.

THE END

* Inspired by the children’s book, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. by Laura Numeroff

A Birthday, a Graduation and an Anniversary*

We all went to church today and celebrated another special holiday in the church calendar.  It was Pentecost, the birthday of the Christian church.  So, in addition to our usual worship service, where the kids often assist as acolytes and I assist giving communion, the service had a festive flair.  There were flags during the procession, incense, and  birthday cake and a jazz trio on the lawn after the service.  Even the altar looked festive because it was  adorned in the color for Pentacost, which also happens to be my favorite color–red. Underneath our albs many of us wore red, including me.

Red shoes

With me and the older kids participating in the service, Juan and Diego sat by themselves in the pew.  Juan kept Diego entertained by letting Diego draw on  on pew cards. Diego drew the same thing he always draws:

A Christmas scene

When Juan asked him why he always draws a Christmas scene, Diego said he would draw something else. And he drew this:

Easter scene drawn by Diego

I guess he doesn’t know how to draw a Pentacost scene.

Sigh.

After church we had another celebration to attend, graduation.  Diego graduated in cub scouts today.  He graduated from a Tiger cub to a Wolf cub.  The ceremony is called “bridging” and marked by the boys from his pack crossing over a bridge. We took a picnic lunch to a local park and celebrated with the other families. How quckly time flies. I remember when we were at the same park watching Nico bridge as a cub scout. Now Nico is  a boy scout and working his way up in rank.

Sigh.

Diego goes from a Tiger cub to Wolf, and trades his orange scarf for a yellow one.

After all that you think we’d be done with our celebrating. But wait, there’s more. We all went out to dinner to celebrate my parents 50th wedding  anniversary.  Through their  50 years together my parents have managed to raise four kids, have 9 grandchildren and share some wonderful, and not so wonderful experiences. Through it all they have stayed comitted to each other and our family   We like to joke that my we don’t know how my mom managed to do it.  As if to prove our point, my dad told us his own joke tonight.  He said that my mom saw him crying on their anniversary. When my mom asked my dad why he was crying, he told her that  50 years ago my grandfather caught my dad and mom together and, with his shotgun aimed at my dad,  my grandfather asked him to either marry my mom or go to jail. My dad jokingly recounted how he chose to marry my mom.  Again, my mom asked him, why he was crying. My dad explained,  he was crying because he realized that if had chosen jail, he would be a free man now.

Sigh.

My parents on our recent trip to New York

*This post was inspired by the post, Blessings, Tonys and Zombies, in Accidental Stepmom. Check her out.